DJ TOMHANKS

That sucks. I just lost a long and incredibly witty blog because I had to use freaking windows media player to burn a man man/sunset rubdown disc for my ride ro Philly. Fucking bullshit. Ahhhh! Well obviously, I'm here today to talk about DJ motherfucking tomhanks ya'll! Back and here to stay. This ain't no freaking left turn trip, son. I'll try and recreate this but I totally lost my flow. I'll tell you this much: my last one didn't start like that. Whatever, no one reads this anyway. I dj-ed all throughout college up at Fordham and even rocked out downtown once in a while. I was never that good but I was fine with my relative shittyness. I was used to dj-ing with cats like k. ross or capsandjones and getting blown out of the water. I mean, I never practiced ever and didn't give a rat's ass about mixing. I just wanted to put on the track that was gonna get the most hype whenever possible. And that's that. But By the time I got back from the road trip these dudes were 'so freaking focused,' as funk flex would say. I had a hard time calling myself a dj anymore.
I could always get by as a dj because I know my music. The money I've made spinning records is a slight return on the tens of thousands of dollars I've spent on music throughout my years. Someone owes me dammit! You there, come to the tomhanks party and booze heavier than Papa. I can rock a party with my classics catalog and shake your asses with the newness. Thats just how I do. Now that I'm back to work and can practice while spinning, dj tomhanks is finally mixing. I've realized that all I need to play a good set are a few decent mixes. I can get by the rest of the night with letting songs ride out and cutting the power for dramatic effect. Plus that takes care of my urge to just let shit rock regardless of beat orientation. Putting on a consistent set has eluded me for so long but I know I can do it now. I've been studying music my whole life and know beats. I'm just lazy up there and that shits gotta stop. I gotta get on my game.
Shamefully, I didn't really make any money at either party this week. I think they dicked us at Niagra and there just weren't enough people at Capone's. But thats how it happens and its also the beginning. Shits gonna pop off sooner or later. I can just feel it: its gonna be a dope summer. And I'm getting ready. With at least one weekly, I must stay on my music now. To help with the first week, I stocked up on every dj's best friend this year: the Justice remix. I found about 15 of them in addition to the 'never be alone' and dfa 1979 mixes I already had. Most of them were funky as hell and the scenario rock 'schitzo dancer' remix is fire. The way he ironicaly pleads 'please no techno' is enough to make anyone at least grimmace and shake. Its worth coming out to see me just to hear that jam. Trust me. I got plenty of jams. And while the hipsters at niagra aren't that down with the new rap bangers, the capones kids aren't that self-aware and delusional. They like good music of all genres. So for them, I also prepared. I gotta bounce though. Stay tuned for full reviews of my party rocking jawdroppers.
spot this week.